shameless persistence

"And He said to them, Which of you who has a friend will go to him at midnight and will say to him, Friend, lend me three loaves [of bread], For a friend of mine who is on a journey has just come, and I have nothing to put before him; And he from within will answer, Do not disturb me; the door is now closed, and my children are with me in bed; I cannot get up and supply you [with anything]? I tell you, although he will not get up and supply him anything because he is his friend, yet because of his shameless persistence and insistence he will get up and give him as much as he needs. So I say to you, Ask and keep on asking and it shall be given you; seek and keep on seeking and you shall find; knock and keep on knocking and the door shall be opened to you. For everyone who asks and keeps on asking receives; and he who seeks and keeps on seeking finds; and to him who knocks and keeps on knocking, the door shall be opened. What father among you, if his son asks for a loaf of bread, will give him a stone; or if he asks for a fish, will instead of a fish give him a serpent? If you then, as evil as you are, know how to give good gifts [gifts that are to their advantage] to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask and continue to ask Him!" Luke 11

Shameless persistence. I cannot even think of a way to introduce the words of Jesus without cutting straight through to this- SHAMELESS PERSISTENCE. 

Every Friday here in Haiti- well where I live- is Bingo Day. The children know it, I know it, and in case I didn't, they refuse to let me forget it. On Monday, we are asking for Bingo. Tuesday, Wednesday, every day that is not Friday, we still ask if it is Bingo day. After which I go into my days of the week song and series of questioning "What day do we play bingo?" "Well what day is today?" "So if we play bingo on Friday's and today is Tuesday, then are we playing bingo today?" 9 times out of 10 I am a stickler for the rules. Yet one afternoon, a sweet little dear skipped along side me "Jessica, bingo please, please can I play bingo today?" "No, cherie, today is Sunday and you just played Friday" "oh PLEASE Jessica PLEASE I MUST PLAY BINGO" "No. we only play on Friday's." "I know but PLEASE PLEASE BINGO I MUST PLAY BINGO" 5 minutes later. "Jessica please please BINGO" One hour later, following me wherever I went, her cries for bingo growing louder and more insistent. "OK FINE. You persistent widow. You can play bingo" 

I tell you this long drawn out story about my 6 year old to show you the power of persistence. I held firm, yet she held firm. I gave in one hour later for no reason other than that it had been an hour and I was tired of her asking. I figured if she cared enough about bingo to beg for an hour then she deserved to play. That isn't even what I wanted to type about but its a phrase I have scribbled in my journal that keeps popping up. Shameless Persistence. Shameless in that you are not embarrassed, you don't care what you look like, how you sound, that you don't deserve it, that its not even bingo day...that you've been begging for hours, you don't stop until you are given what you ask. 

I am going to go ahead and side step any comments I need to make about us not thinking this means we can go to God, beg for what we want relentlessly and he will give us anything and everything- because we know better and that would be a waste of time. 

So- piece 1 of today's puzzle- SHAMELESS PERSISTENCE.

Part 2: the conundrum. I am faced with a decision these days that actually has a due date and ever so dramatically affects the rest of my life. After a month of praying and just bringing it up to God, I still don't know yet- or at least I thought I did and now I doubt. I was reading the other day where God told Abraham to pack his bags and GO. He had no clue where but he did and the Scriptures don't say he complained one bit about it. I said to Jesus "Of course he obeyed- Abraham had it easy, at least you told him to go. If you told me what to do, I would obey it Lord." And the Holy Spirit, in all its truth, love and cutting like a 2 edge sword said to me "What have you already been asked to do that you are not obeying?" Ouch. Whatever could he mean? Except I knew exactly what he was talking about it. How can I pick and choose what commands I obey and then beg God for a new one? From here on my heart process went a bit like this: 

When I don't know what to do- I do what I know to do. Am I walking in love? Am I making disciples? Am I walking faith? Am I feeding on His word? Am I thanking Him? Am I praising Him? Am I spending time in intimate worship? Am I praying in the Spirt (who knows all things and searches all things)? If I am not doing those things- operating in the commands of God- I cannot be entrusted with a new assignment or command. 

Luke 17- There are like 10 lepers and they cry out to Jesus to heal them. He doesn't lay hands, doesn't heal them right then and there, he sends them to the priest. AND AS THEY WENT, they were healed. Did you catch that? As they carried out what Christ had commanded them, what they asked for was given. What would have happened if they had argued with him, refused, even to go forward, doubting they would be healed if they went ahead? No, they did what they were told even when they didn't see. It happened as they obeyed. 

I have been reading and re-reading Philippians 4 for the last month. 

"Rejoice in the Lord always [delight, gladden yourselves in Him]; again I say, Rejoice! Let all men know and perceive and recognize your unselfishness (your considerateness, your forbearing spirit). The Lord is near [He is coming soon]. Do not fret or have any anxiety about anything, but in every circumstance and in everything, by prayer and petition ([definite requests), with thanksgiving, continue to make your wants known to God. And God’s peace [shall be yours, that [c]tranquil state of a soul assured of its salvation through Christ, and so fearing nothing from God and being content with its earthly lot of whatever sort that is, that peace] which transcends all understanding shall garrison and mount guard over your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. For the rest, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is worthy of reverence and is honorable and seemly, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely and lovable, whatever is kind and winsome and gracious, if there is any virtue and excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think on and weigh and take account of these things [fix your minds on them]. Practice what you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, and model your way of living on it, and the God of peace (of untroubled, undisturbed well-being) will be with you."

1. Rejoice....ALWAYS

2. Gladden yourself- when you are discouraged, sad, unsure- you- stir yourself up- make yourself glad from His promises (or usually a great way to accomplish this is by blessing others- meeting a need in their life.....)

3. DO NOT FRET OR HAVE ANY ANXIETY ABOUT ANYTHING

4. BUT IN EVERYTHING 

     1. pray with a definite request

     2. be thankful (REALLY CRUCIAL)

     3. continue to make your want known to God

5. THEN HIS PEACE IS YOURS- GUARDING covering securing your heart and mind- surpassing all understanding (of the situation, the pieces, the future, yourself, others)

6. Think on the things of him- meditate on the right things! How else will you not worry and be thankful when things are hard???

7. THEN HE - the God of PEACE- WILL BE WITH YOU

There are too many nuggets in there. But this is what God is telling me. Jess- you don't feel confident or like you know what to too but you can rest assured in My sovereignty. You can be thankful for what you do know, what you will know (because my Word promises wisdom generously as you ask and tells you that I-Jesus- know the plans I have for you and that I am faithful to finish the work I started in you). You can not worry but tell me what you need, you can let My peace be yours. I am with you. When you don't know what to do- don't wish your situation, circumstances away. Do what you already know. And watch how that opens the door for me to shed more light on your path. 

Y'all bottom line- HE IS A GOOD FATHER. He does not withhold from his children what they need or even desire. We ask for wisdom but He gives us peace and wisdom. I asked to show the love of Christ to the nations- he moved me to Haiti and gave me 69 children. We must meditate on who he really is- not this false image we have of a withholding, stingy, limited, -I'm going to make things hard for them- God. Thats not his character. And if we believe that, what can we expect to receive from him? "you have not because you ask not" "it will be according to your faith"

"Trust me", he whispers. "Why did you doubt ME, Peter?", as he started sinking under the wave. Not "Why did you doubt you could walk on water Peter?" but why do we doubt Christ is who he says he is and does what he says he can (or has already proven he can)?

So- its Wednesday, two days from my decision deadline. And I don't know what to do- YET. But I am thankful the answer is coming. That I have the holy spirit living inside me, revealing to me what he hears from the father, who searches the deep things and articulates what I cant, the advocate, guider and counselor. I am thankful as I step out in faith, he guides me, correcting me as needed. And I rejoice in the peace offered and given so lavishly by a generous father. He is a good father. And we are loved. Be shameless in your pursuit of Him.